I have struggled my whole life with this concept. It may be apparent to some of you following this blog. I can fall out of momentum and go for extended periods of time without taking the proper action that I know will propel me forward to a better lifestyle. This may be to my struggles mastering my momentum system. It is very important that we gain control over this system that regulates our ability and willingness to take action. It may sound a little superstitious but it is hard to explain the internal systems that create the mental space in which one feels more inclined to do difficult tasks as opposed to avoiding them.
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The Hero Archetype in culture
Its a well known fact that we as human beings have archetypal ideas deeply ingrained In our subconscious psyche. This means we resonate with certain stories and the manner in which they unfold. Why else would movies make millions if not billions of dollars at the box office if there wasn’t such a deeply human and universal appeal to them. Once you understand the idea that we are all connected by similar ideas we pass down from generation to generation, The world of engagement makes a little more sense than it may have previously.
The hero’s myth is when a person is led right up until the jaws of death and destruction and creates useful order out of his willingness to risk it all. Its one of the stories we resonate with the most. Its the story of a man reaching beyond him or herself and putting the well being of others before his own in order to create a better world better protected against the claws of evil. Its one that moves us to tears and creates strong emotion within ourselves even if only being witnessed on a screen. As you go about your day, try to think of cool ways you can see the Hero archetype around you and better understand the emotional pull it has on most of humanity.
- We see it in the bible as Jesus sacrifices all to show humanity his compassion and love for his fellow humans.
- We see it in spider man when he gives every ounce of physical strength to save a train full of passengers.
- We see it in sports when the underdog pushes to the last minute and wins the game at the buzzer. (people behave bizarrely euphoric when this happens by the way)
- We see it in war heroes returning home to their families after risking it all.
Can you think of any other situations where someone stepping up for humanity has moved you to tears?
Goal Setting
We’ve all heard it said again and again, Time after time, set your goals and aim towards them. You need to have something to aim at, it keeps the anxiety and the unknown at bay. I had never understood or tried this kind of directed focus and implementation until today. I dug up some old school notebooks in my attic and wrote down my goals for the rest of 2019. I gotta say, it felt great looking at my goals written down and not feeling lost and without direction. One of the goals I wrote down is to make at least 5 blog posts on here a week. I don’t really care about followers and becoming popular but it fascinates me to have a place to dump what knowledge I have acquired and my overall perspective on things into the infinite realm of reality that is the internet.
Get out of your head!!
Your brain is pretty much useless when it comes to achieving a more favorable emotional state. The more experience I achieve in getting out of negative emotional loops, the more I realize that it is quite frankly impossible to think yourself out of a negative emotional state. The positive emotion of confidence, peace and tranquility is achieved through a strong connection with the physical realm of oneself. Get active and hit the gym and take tons of action towards your goals and you will feel great. Sit and try to think your way out of things and you will only dig the emotional hole deeper. This is easier said than done. I highly encourage you next time you feel down and out to just take a few steps towards your goals and allow the momentum to pick up slowly. As the days go by and you gain momentum you well be able to perform tasks you had previously only dreamed of achieving.
Be the fool
If there is one fear that has been so deeply ingrained in us over thousands of years, It is the fear of rejection. We all want to do as many things as possible to fit into the pack as best as we can. So you may have wondered, as I did, why this is the case. Well this is a neurological pathway ingrained in you through your DNA. You see we were once a tribe species in which we formed ourselves into small groups of people and helped each other through the realizations of our unique skills. To be rejected or to be set aside from the group meant certain death. One human being could not survive all on their own or even if they did they would not be able to replicate for obvious reasons. Things have, needless to say, changed dramatically from the small tribe formulation of society. Our DNA however has changed very little if not at all. So what we have is a disconnect between what we believe could put us in harms way and the reality of life today. The reality is that nowadays we can afford to play the fool and purposefully put ourselves in the way of rejection and there will be little to no serious consequences. the reality is that by playing the fool and delving into something we are not completely familiar with is the way to go if you truly want to live your life to the full potential that is within you. So play the fool and throw care to the wind, You may end up being a leader of the tribe.
Do it Today Or Never!
There is an idea that I’ve found to be true throughout my entire life. That is the idea that action taking has its own momentum just as not taking action has its own momentum. Therefore, the smallest act of getting something done will bring with it a slight improvement in your getting it done muscle. There is also a synyster little weakling muscle that is geared towards holding you in place and not improving but instead moving backward. Every day you pander to your no action muscle you are making it stronger and thus bringing forth a wave of no progress and little to no improvement in the areas in your life you know you should be taking care of. If you don’t do what you want to do today, chances are you are not just delaying your happiness and fulfillment but you are putting your goals and aspirations in the grave. This is not what you want on your mind in your deathbed and I think we can all agree on that.
Taking Action Is Life Essence
I have throughout most of my youth been a pretty static person. Watching the world pass me by was the default state of mind I would engage in. I had a low level buzz of anxiety in virtually all of my endeavours in life. Nothing came to me spontaneously and no action was ever taken without rigorous mental measurement and calculations made of every outcome as to lessen pain and increase pleasure, Paradoxically this is very counterproductive to improving ones outlook on life and overall internal peace. The art of taking action is the single most important principle for anyone looking to take their life to the next level. Just take action, do what it is you know damn well you’ve been putting off for weeks months and possibly even years, Just do it, Do it now or forever hold your peace as they say.
The Kubrickian Way (Part 3)
I do love you and you know there is something very important we need to do as soon as possible…..Fuck. These are the words spoken at the very last scene of the Kubrick masterpiece based on the novel “Traumnovelle” by Arthur Schnitzler. There is something deeply meaningful in these words so elegantly spoken by the very elegant Alice Hartford. As human beings living in the modern age with all of our perceived newfound wisdom, we tend to forget just how primitive we all really are. Our advertisements utilize sex and sexual undertones to spike our emotions before flashing their pretty little logos across the screen. We still use war as a means to an end. No matter how intellectual or well behaved we may act in public, we still have to squat down in the toilet and take a dump. For every self improvement book on the shelf and every guided meditation we take part in, there is a person dying to fuck their co-worker and another shot down in the streets of Chicago. Civilizations are built and destroyed because of sex. Empires rise and fall due to sexual frustration. Entire careers are built for the fleeting pleasure of carnal ecstasy. This is the theme of eyes wide shut and the interplay between the masculine and feminine.
Now while I do think that it is common for a woman to be born with masculine traits as well as for a man to be born with feminine traits, Gender is not the topic of discussion here. There is a polarity that is absolutely vital for sexual attraction between two people. There must be a hunter and the pray. The dominator and the dominated. The ravaged and the ravager. When these polarly opposite forces are not present in an encounter with another person, Sexual attraction is diminished or non existent all together. This is why we call it attraction, It is one force absorbing another and bringing it into the depths of his or her world. It is one person taking another for a ride(pun intended) and the other utilizing their mystique and sexual value. This is the dilemma that our good doctor Bill Hartford is faced with.
Bill is thrown into the realms of chaos after discovering his pretty little wife isn’t the ideal he had placed upon women, or upon the harsh reality of sexual power. He may have been led to believe that being a doctor and held in high esteem amongst the upper class was enough to uphold his view of himself as a man, but is shown the truth by his wife in a drug fueled rant about her primitive instincts to mate across dominance hierarchies. She speaks about how at the time she had this intensely sexual affair fantasy , Bill was dearer to her than ever, they had conversations about their future, they talked about their young daughter Helena. She also almost cynically states that at no point in these interactions with Bill had the man of her forbidden fantasy ever been out of her mind. This is enough to drive a man into pure confusion and to act upon foolish instinct just to regain even a shred of his identity.
The film seriously challenges ones belief about conventional wisdom and the “sanctity” of marriage. Sandor, the man Alice is entranced with while dancing at Ziegler’s party, makes the point that marriage was merely a human creation for women to have the protection of a man while free to engage in sexual encounters with those who really aroused her sexual fantasies. Alice is in a way initiated into this landscape of awareness at this time and thus decides to share her story with Bill to perhaps make him understand what she now sees. The thin fabric of society, of marriage, of relationships, of friendships and even of self esteem can rest upon one revelation of intent and betrayal. The world is not all puppies and rainbows as your mommy and daddy want you to believe. The world can be a cruel and coldly calculated reproductive war between those who are awake and those who have their eyes wide shut.
On Dreams
Earlier this year I started doing some research and began looking into the teachings of the co-founder of the psychoanalytic school, Carl Jung. His ideas on the unconscious borrowed in part from his greatest mentor Sigmund Freud, fascinated me to a great extent. This is not the topic of todays rambling. Last night I had some of the most intense dream experiences I have had in a very long time. I had my first nightmare in what feels like years. I had about 5 different dreams in a night with about 2 instances where I actually woke up. Dreams are an unbelievable experience indeed. I believe many people tend to overlook the fact that many nights we get to undergo an alternate reality where quite literally anything is possible. Until a few months ago I believed these experiences to be random events and ideas floating through the mind as they were being readied to be stored away or deleted forever. I no longer come to that conclusion. I am now a student of dreams, I began keeping a dream journal as I have found they help to remember the dreams as most are quickly forgotten. Dream journals are also said to aid in the undergoing of lucid dreaming where one gets to control their dreams and become aware that they are indeed in a fantasy. Studying the patterns and my place in life at the time of the dream could clue me in to repressed feelings trapped in my subconscious but beckoning me to bring them to light. The subconscious is its own entity with its own drives and desires. It does not utilize conventional language and symbols. Therefore, It attempts to explain to our conscious minds ideas that long to be expressed in the best way it can. This is the Idea brought forth by Carl Jung.My new analytical undertaking will attempt to disprove or incorporate into my daily existence the conscious examination of the surreal, often times more emotionally intense experience of dreams. If a pattern of meaning and significant consistency is to be found in our deeper selve’s nocturnal musings, I believe this to be an area very worthwhile of exploring.
For the first time last night,(at least from what I can remember) I had a dream within a dream. I remember being shamed for doing some mundane activity in my living room. I must’ve been playing some kind of game when some shadowy figure of about 6 feet tall began mockingly laughing at me and pointing directly at my face. I remember the feeling of shame and extreme anger at this figure as he had my full undivided attention, standing there and laughing at some sort of inadequacy I could not pin point. He began walking away from me and walking down some random set of stairs. All the while I could still hear him maniacally laughing at me while I shouted at the top of my lungs “Don’t laugh at me!!”. Suddenly I am in a bed as if I was a patient at a hospital but I am in a dark room similar to my own. I am looking to the side but I have a feeling of certainty that if I look up and to the right, Something of great evil and ill intent is going to be waiting for me. If anyone has ever watched the film Mullholland drive, which is a film heavily centered around dreams and fantasy , the café scene comes to mind. In the scene, a man is certain there is a frightening face waiting for him near the dumpsters. He goes over to the place he fears in order to rid himself of his curiosity and fears but ends up finding exactly what he feared most. So back in my dream I turn and look up and to the right. I found exactly what I was afraid of. A disfigured woman was on all fours stuck to the ceiling wearing a sort of worn down white dress.As soon as I was about to scream I wake up in my bed.
I wake up agitated and covered in sweat from the adrenaline of my night mare. I walk downstairs to greet my mother who has a troubled and concerned look on her face. “Have you been getting bullied recently?” she asks. I don’t respond but I realize that I must’ve been screaming “don’t laugh at me” while in my sleep. I feel a wave of shame and anger at her question, The same emotions felt during the actual dream. I didn’t know it at the time but the surreal thing is that I was indeed in another dream. I was in a dream analyzing the events of a dream I believed I had woken up from. The dream went on to sort of speed up in the amount of jumps to one place to another. I found myself outside a CVS talking to a girl I found very attractive. After some talking we find ourselves sitting in the front seat of her car. I remember being really attracted to her freckles. I place my hand on her back and felt her skin and looked in her face and felt aroused and happy to be with her at that point in time. She was like an angel to me in my dream. I felt relaxed and at home with her and wanted nothing more than to make love to this woman. More stuff happened that I cant remember but hopefully with my journaling of experiences I will become better at remembering more of my dreams.
The Kubrickian Way (Part 2)
If there is one thing I believe should rank highly amongst the filmgoers and movie-buffs hierarchy of perceived cinematic importance, that would be the ability to obtain meaning and information useful for day to day life from the film. Stanley Kubrick, in my humble opinion, has by far the most amount of compacted information, symbols and meaning in every film than any other director to ever play the game of expression through moving pictures. Not only is every one of his movies worth re-watching maybe immediately or maybe after a few years of contemplation and newfound experience, But they are meant to be analyzed and broken down in many different ways aside from the dialogue and the actors expressions and mannerisms.
A clear cut example of this idea of reading between the lines and actively seeking to understand the mad genius of this man we call the master director is found in his ultimate film, Eyes Wide Shut. There is an underlying theme throughout the whole movie of the struggle between opposites. This eternal and ever present conflict is represented throughout the movie very clearly deliberately through the subtle use of the colors red and blue. If you watch the movie as movies are meant to be watched, As a series of moving pictures, you will begin to understand part of what Kubrick is trying to describe to his audience through these well known symbols. I’ve heard an analysis from a well known youtuber talk about how the possible significance of these two polarly opposite colors could be the separation of Reality(Blue) and Fantasy or Desire(Red). This concept absolutely blew me away as it had opened up a new layer to the movie in a matter of seconds. I could now re-watch the movie and basically get to see an entire new perspective on a film I had watched over 7 times. This is the beauty of a movie of this magnitude, it plays out like a book, more concerned with creating an atmosphere where the audience is actively participating in the creation of meaning in the film than the characters themselves are.
Another great example of the subtle use of symbols and ideas in Kubrick films is found in the movie The Shining. Although there are countless theories and speculations about what this movie means and what hidden messages are being conveyed, There is one particular aspect of the movie which has always fascinated me, his use of mirrors. It has been said and is widely believed by many spiritualists and followers of esoteric knowledge that mirrors can actually be used as a portal or gate into another side of reality, A darker, more sinister side than that which we inhabit. Many Satanists and practicioners of witchcraft as well as black magic have been known to use mirrors in ritual initiations to call forth demonic entities through the use of mirrors and dark reflective surfaces. This is something I have little doubt was considered when filming the scene where Jack Torrence is beckoning Danny to come into his hotel room to sit on his lap. He has a menacing look on his face as we can only truly see revealed in the mirror, Thus alluding to the idea that Jack Torrence is slowly slipping into a state where he no longer has control over himself but some otherworldly entity residing in the hotel is taking hold of a man who is already susceptible to questionable behavior. He portrays the idea of possession and the paranormal so extraordinarily well that one has no choice but to actively engage in the world being created around us as we are so engrossed in the film that we go into a sort of suspended reality. This is how I believe movies should always be trying to create their stories, placing the emphasis on the experience of the viewer and not using cheesy music or sound cues to tell us how to feel.
The Gambino Family 